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Making the Grade

Usually, you don’t have to be perfect to get an “A.” In fact, A’s are usually given for anywhere between 90-100% on a test.  So if a student pushes for just 10% mistakes, he can still get the top grade.  Not so with music.  Musicians push for all 100% played correctly.  Can you imagine if a musical piece was performed with “only” 10% of the notes wrong?  The audience would cringe a lot to hear all those wrong notes, or even boo!  Musicians push for total perfection, and most of them reach mighty close.

My musicianship was stretched when I was asked to be the choir pianist for our church choir.  It has been a hard calling for me, because although I can play the piano pretty good, I am definitely NOT mistake-free.  I have to practice and practice, and still I make a few mistakes–and feel like a total failure. 

For Easter this year, I was determined to overcome this problem.  The piece that the choir was going to perform on Easter Sunday was a difficult one, joyful and fast! So I started early.  For weeks, I sat down at the piano for a good session of practice four times a day.  I simplified the chords where I could, pushed for muscle memory for my fingers, and used a metronome to build my time faster.  My poor family must have heard that song in their dreams!  But I was determined that I wouldn’t take away from the Spirit of this wonderful Easter Day, celebrating the Lord’s resurrection with this amazing exuberant, joyful piece! 

It was such a mind game.  I worked hard to tell myself that I was practiced, and I could do this!  I even programmed my mind what to think: “I will play this piece beautifully and help bring the Spirit on Easter Sunday.”  I tried to shut out all doubts.

Sunday arrived, and I was ready.  I played through my piece once again at home.  I warmed up in the Relief Society room.  (I had practiced on the chapel piano the week before.)  I had prayed and my family prayed for me.  I had done everything I could. 

Then it was time for the introduction.  It came out beautifully!  I was doing it all just right!  Then, alas, someone sang the chorus the old way (not the new way we had practiced).  It threw my timing off.  An entire measure went by before I could get back in!  But I managed to rejoin (and next time the chorus came around, the director sang the new rhythm with the group to make sure they got it this time).  I was pretty shook up, but I did end up finishing strong. 

Still, it had been a huge mistake.  Alas, once again, I had fallen short of my goal of a perfect piece.  Had I distracted from the Spirit on Easter too? No one said anything, but no one said anything!

I remember hearing about an author who just couldn’t get her book perfect.  It was a religious history book she had written and she hoped to present to the Lord a perfect book.  But she knew there were mistakes.  Finally, in answer to her prayer, the Lord assured her that it was good enough, and that He accepted her efforts.  At last, she felt peace.

Mistakes are a huge part of parenting as well.  We all make them constantly.  I feel sorry for my first child—we had to learn so much on her!  Once she was barely old enough, we were so excited to get her a big beautiful bike of her own!  However, being large, that bike was hard to learn to balance on!  I’m afraid we traumatized her in our enthusiasm to help her learn.  On subsequent children, we learned to start them out on a tiny bike, one they can balance easily by just reaching their legs down.  Now they even have wonderful balancing bikes with no pedals—success the first try!  We hope our kids remember the good.  But when Mom or Dad mess up, our kids learn a lot too.  When we apologize to them and try again, they learn they too can make mistakes, then get up and try again as well. 

This life is not for perfection.  It’s for making mistakes, for falling down and then getting back up.  It’s for trying again and again.  We don’t learn anything when we coast along with ease.  In addition, the contest is with no one else, just ourselves and we don’t have to compare our journey with anyone else’s.  (See Haws, J.B. “Wrestling with Comparisons” BYU Devotional May 7, 2019). 

Our Savior suffered and died so that we CAN make mistakes, repent, learn from them, and try again.   Satan’s way would have forced everyone do it right the first time, and not learn a thing!  I sure have learned a lot from my painful piano efforts.  And the Lord is so kind that I’m sure He notices every note that was played right!  Even more, He loves the person who tried.